we sat in a quiet coffee shop, with so much history between us. the years had not been kind on my heart darling, it was too late to tell you how much i cared, how much i loved you, that i’d loved you for years. so i did the only thing i could do, i sat and listened to your life, the one i wasn’t apart of anymore and all i wanted to do was tell you how much i missed you. that the years hadn’t changed my feelings, and god i wish they did. i wanted to tell you, you were the love of my life but you’d had found the love of yours and you were finally happy, you talked about her, your home and wanting to start a family. my broken heart was screaming just tell her because maybe she loved you too and i don’t doubt she did, but it was a familiar type of love, it was not the same. so i just listened to your stories, hoping it would never end because i hated watching you leave over and over again, never knowing if you’d come back. as we left the empty coffee shops, mugs on the table, all i could hear in the silence was the sound of my heart. i hugged you hoping i could pour everything into this one moment. so i could let it be because i didn’t know if those moments would be all we had. i never knew if it would be the last time i saw you. maybe this was all i was going to get from loving you, being left heartbroken. 

–the years hadn’t changed my feelings, but loving you hurt.