Posted on by tashjcurry

I don’t ever want to lose that one perfect memory of us.

Over the years, the pain, those memories started to fade. I started to heal. My heart didn’t hurt from the thought of you or ache for the sound of your name. I stopped looking for you in the eyes of other people I passed in the street. I moved on with my life, but sometimes when I sat down to write, you always came to my mind, were you happy, did you find somebody else. Did you sometimes still think of me and what we had, what we could have been. Sometimes I hope I’d find you in my words, in our memories. I always wanted to check up on you but I couldn’t bring myself to know if you’d fallen for someone who wasn’t me, and I know what we had happened a long time ago but you my love hold a special place in my heart. I just wanted to remember us, and the way were were all those years ago when we were younger, happier. 

–i don’t ever want to lose that one perfect memory of us.

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my love for you will always be there, you just need to know where to look

Years from now people will read of us. They’ll recall our names in the history books, see the words we spoke and the legacy we became, in those forgotten stories once filled with hope of a new world. 

They’ll know the beasts we slayed, the labours we faced, the wars we fought. But they’ll never know of the love we shared, and they’ll never see the words I longed to stay to you while I still had the time. 

My love you for was scattered through history amongst the stories of the great divinities, demigods and of course the epic tragedies we became. You will always find a part of us there in the forgotten ruins of ancient myths. There was nothing I could do darling, I couldn’t save us from time, from history catching up with us, or changing our story to something that we were not. 

Maybe one day, someday soon, or years down the line we’ll get a peaceful ending, a soft epilogue, a story in which the world knew we had lived.

–my love for you will always be there, you just need to know where to look.

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I’m in love with you, now I’ve said it.

I didn’t say it enough, those three words. 

I never told you how I felt about you, my love. 

I never said: 

i love you.

i’m in love with you.

all i wanted was you.

So I wrote it all down, here in these pages.

Waiting for you to find them.

And god I hope you find them…

one day.

–i’m in love with you, now i’ve said it. 

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I would know him in death, at the end of the world.

you fell in love with a boy,

a half god, half human,

he became half of your soul,

as the poet said 

he was made to be a weapon.

never to know peace,

only war and bloodshed

to appease the gods 

but you loved him

and that was enough.

you hoped it would be enough.

enough to think that a love 

like yours could save him,

even though the battle

raged on in his head 

and tore at his heart 

until there was nothing left.

wars came, 

battles won

labours lost 

but you still had him

and that was all that mattered.

after everything we did,

everything we became 

the epilogue would read 

as a tragedy.

somewhere down the line

the gods sealed our fate,

our end,

our story became a tale of woe,

only history would forget

about our undying love,

but darling how they would remember you.

our story became 

a tragedy,

but

you and i my love,

would always find each other 

defying heaven and hell 

just to hold you again,

to find the other half of my heart.

so until then my darling,

i’ll be here

waiting

for you. 

– i would know him in death, at the end of the world. 

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my heart still breaks for every story in which we don’t end up together.

I hope there are different universes out there. One’s where I made different choices, chose different paths. Told different stories, that weren’t filled with such heartache. A universe in which I am with you, one where we are together, and we’re happy. One where we haven’t been separated by fate made to walk down different paths, forced into making different choices, choosing other people instead of each other. 

Somewhere I believe that we’re happy, in another universe my darling, another lifetime, a distant story. 

–my heart still breaks for every story in which we don’t end up together. 

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name one hero who was happy… you can’t.

In this story you are not Patroclus and I Achilles. Our end would not be one for history to turn us into a mere tragedy, one where you had the courage that I did not. This is not the story where I hold your lifeless body to my now un-beating heart.

In this story we don’t lose each other because of my fate, to a war we cannot win, to the likely hood of death. Death cannot touch us because in this story I choose you over glory, my mothers wishes, over everything else the gods had planned for me. 

In this story our love prevails, and we end up happy.

–name one hero who was happy.. you can’t.

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it was just bad timing

I looked at you, and you at me. Our eyes met and I remembered the past that we had, the love we shared. That our story ended years ago now.

I felt like I was back at the beginning of our story, and our story was not bound in dust, forgotten, pushed right back into the bookcase, left to never be open again.

In that moment I wished I could go back in time, back to that moment in which I told you that I hadn’t got the courage you had, to the moment I told you that I did not love you, the moment I broke my heart.

I wish we met five years later, I wish you met me when I knew what I wanted, not when I was eighteen. But I guess some stories are better left untouched, we just had bad timing my love. But my god, if we loved again I swear I’d love you right.

-it was just bad timing

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in another place, in another time what could we have been?

darling there was so many things

i wanted to say to you,

those things i never said when i had the chance.

all the words left unspoken,

all these confessions of a lost love

never to find peace amongst these pages.

nor to find solace in your arms,

or heaven on your lips.

i know we couldn’t be together in this world,

nor at this time

this place.

fate was never on our side.

you belonged to her,

and i would always belong to you

but

we could never belong to each other,

never at the same time.

so i hope

if other universe exist,

somewhere out there

if the fates allow

we chose each other,

and we end up happy.

– in another place, in another time what could we have been?

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i want to write a different story, one where the hero ends up happy.

I can’t want this anymore,

I can’t want you anymore.

I don’t want to write about the possibility of us when

I know this isn’t a story of you and me.

It never was.

It never will be.

I need to find a new love,

someone I can love,

someone who will love me.

That will be the story,

the one I want to write.

– i want to write a different story, one where the hero ends up happy.

Posted on by tashjcurry

this dream was always playing round my head, you were always in my heart.

you will always be an almost.

something that never was.

we were just a dream.

a perfect heartbreaking dream.

maybe that dream will become a story,

one day.

maybe in that story we’ll be something

more than an almost.

something that will withstand the test of time.

maybe someday,

maybe we’ll always be a dream

i had.

but i know

we had something,

there was something,

maybe it was love.

maybe it wasn’t.

but in this life,

we’ll always be an almost love.

– this dream was always playing round my head, you were always in my heart.