Posted on by tashjcurry · 1 Comment

You wrote about her like she was the only love you’d ever know.

I never quite understood how a love like that could fall apart. How love couldn’t fix everything, that sometimes it’s not enough. That it wasn’t enough for me. That it couldn’t have been enough for you.

What if you were the one, what if I had just lost the love of my life? What if that one thought would torture me, leaving me with sleepless nights. Would we become one of those forgotten tragedies? Would we ever get our needed epilogue. Would I ever get my closure to end this heavy feeling in my heart. 

I wish sometimes I got a second chance with you, I’d have done things so differently. I wouldn’t have ran when things got serious. But then I might have never gone down this path, I might never have found myself and be who I needed. I might have still be pretending to be someone else, that’s a terrifying thought. Maybe I needed to lose you, but that doesn’t mean I liked dealing with that, the pain it brought.

Sometimes if I let my mind wander, there’s a different life out there for me. One’s where we were enough for each other. Sometimes that’s enough but still those thoughts can break your heart. I think I’ll be constantly living with a broken heart. I’ll always remember the time we had, and my love for you. But now things fade, everything getting distorted. Time was never kind, but then again neither was I. 

I couldn’t let go, I never could. You’d always be somewhere if not in my heart, in my words, never truly leaving me. And I hate that, because you’ll forget, move on and all that I’ll be left with is these words, that’s no comfort. It’ll never be enough for me, the memory of you.

– you wrote about her like she was the only love you’d ever know.

Posted on by tashjcurry

history wont remember a love story between a boy and a half god, I’m sorry my dears you were always considered a tragedy.

one day i’ll sit down and write our story, but this time it wont end in tragedy. it will be a world in which we never had to face war, we got to be kids and grow into our youth. in this story, you my love were not a weapon created by war, made to give your life, and i wouldn’t have to follow you into the battlefield, i wouldn’t have to watch you become bloody and broken. i would have to lose you to a war that we could never have won because that was never our fate, we were always meant to lose. that became our history.

one day our story will be known as something more than a tragedy, i promise. 

–history wont remember a love story between a boy and a half god, I’m sorry my dears you were always considered a tragedy.

Posted on by tashjcurry

you should have been more than just a love letter

i’m sorry i lost you,

i should have held your hand tighter

when i felt it slipping away.

i’m not sorry for loving you,

but i am sorry for never 

telling you sooner. 

i’m sorry that you will 

read these words when

you should have heard them.

i’m sorry that we never stood 

a chance to be more than 

these words.

–you should have been more than just a love letter.

Posted on by tashjcurry

she always said love was a kind of killing.

maybe we were always meant to break each others hearts, maybe that’s the way our story would always go. but that doesn’t mean that our love wasn’t true, that we didn’t love each other with everything we had. maybe we never stood a chance to be more than that in this life, but maybe somewhere else we could be. maybe we could have been better for each other if only we let down our walls. if only we stopped to love each other rather than trying to find love in other people. my love we could have been so much more that what we were. and i came so close to seeing your heart before you broke mine. but the story was always going to be the same, we would always destroy each other in the name of love. 

–she always said love was a kind of killing.

Posted on by tashjcurry

all i wanted was to ask for your love.

there were so many things i wrote down,

so you could never hear them.

all the things i wanted to say.

it wasn’t that i didn’t want to tell you,

because i did,

i do.

but every time i tried

i couldn’t.

i couldn’t tell you

i loved you.

because you never belonged to me,

you were always in love with someone else.

so i wrote them down

in the hopes of maybe one day

you’d realise everything i did

was because i loved you

even if you could never love me.

– all i wanted was to ask for your love.

Posted on by tashjcurry

my heart will always break for you.

you’re trying not to tell her 

that you’ve miss her,

but you have and 

you always will.

but it’s been so long,

and you still feel the same

and that scares you 

because you’ll always be in love with her,

there’ll never be anyone else,

your hearts is hers.

you’re trying not to fall 

apart at the sight of her

but your hands tremble 

and your voice wavering.

it’s been so long since you saw 

her last

and everything comes rushing 

back, 

the echoes of memories

paralyse you

the pain is still there,

your heart still breaking 

for the woman you love

and the sad truth is that

it always will.

–my heart will always break for you.

Posted on by tashjcurry

it was the test of time and the price was our love.

there will be a time where this all fades,

and we’ll become stories

and all that’s left will be our love.

maybe somewhere,

somehow 

history may be kind to us

and remember what we were,

rather than who we became, 

but if your hearing this 

then please

let us be more than

the tragic tale 

of what happed to our love.

but if history is not kind

to us,

if she makes her choice,

i pray that our love lasts 

in the stories she will tell

i hope we last…

withstanding the test of time

because darling 

we were meant to.

i hope history will remember,

the good,

and the way we fell in love

but if not

maybe

in another lifetime, 

a kinder one

we’ll be remembered 

together rather than 

being torn apart.

i don’t want our story

to be remembered 

as one where fate 

did not go our way 

and we lost each other.

because all i wanted 

in this life 

was to be remembered 

with you.

–it was the test of time and the price was our love.

Posted on by tashjcurry

i love you, always [x] i loved you, almost [x] I think I’ll love you forever [x]

in a few days you will leave, 

and i’ll be left with a broken heart.

i never knew the monster at the end of our book would be time, 

we were supposed to have forever to fall back together. 

you told me you broke it off with him, 

that you fell out of love. 

darling, 

you will be my biggest regret, 

i wasted so many months hoping you’d give me a second chance, 

and now it’s gone as fast as it came. 

maybe one day we’ll get our chance, 

until then i’ll settle with our almost,

somewhere out there i believe that we are together in another world,

another life.

and i’m the one who makes you happy.

– i love you, always [x] i loved you, almost [x] I think I’ll love you forever [x]

Posted on by tashjcurry

i was just starting to be able to live without you. but it doesn’t mean that i don’t love you still…

it was easier when you were gone, 

i could keep the dream alive.

i could convince myself that it was

bad timing, a hopeless dream, 

a trick of fate

was the reason we weren’t together,

that it wasn’t because of me.

that i wasn’t scared to love you.

but now your coming home

and that’s all i wanted,

for so long,

for you to be here with me.

but i know it was a hopeless dream,

another life,

but it wasn’t made for us

but i can’t let go of that dream

because it’s the only thing I’ve been able to 

hold onto…

and i know 

this would never last,

but it was easier when it was just a dream 

because you’ll come back

and break my heart all over again. 

and darling it was just healing.

– i was just starting to be able to live without you. but it doesn’t mean that i don’t love you still…

Posted on by tashjcurry

there just has to be happier story for us my love

there has to be another life,

another us

                  somewhere.

         a story in which 

we were happy,

                after everything.

         one where your not

          dying in my arms.

and i can’t save you.

there has to to be one,

just that 

               one.

where we live,

                    where 

        we find peace knowing

the war is over.

                           it’s done.

                 and 

we don’t have to fight 

                                   anymore.

          one 

                where 

                          we can live.

there has to be a universe 

                                      where this isn’t 

                                                   the only ending,

                                        we get.

that they’re other stories,

                                    for us

                    out there.

       because we can’t be…

this can’t be…

          we’re not this almost which was

                                            never enough for us,

                                                                     for this story.

       there has to be another.

this can’t be the only end.  

                                           we don’t deserve this my love.

i hope were there in and amongst 

                others stories, 

                                                     happy ones

                           because we lived

                      through too many 

                               tragedies

                       history wont let us forget.

and i can’t lose you again.

                                         i won’t.

      we deserve to be happy, my love.

–  there just has to be happier story for us my love.