Posted on by tashjcurry

i love you, always [x] i loved you, almost [x] I think I’ll love you forever [x]

in a few days you will leave, 

and i’ll be left with a broken heart.

i never knew the monster at the end of our book would be time, 

we were supposed to have forever to fall back together. 

you told me you broke it off with him, 

that you fell out of love. 

darling, 

you will be my biggest regret, 

i wasted so many months hoping you’d give me a second chance, 

and now it’s gone as fast as it came. 

maybe one day we’ll get our chance, 

until then i’ll settle with our almost,

somewhere out there i believe that we are together in another world,

another life.

and i’m the one who makes you happy.

– i love you, always [x] i loved you, almost [x] I think I’ll love you forever [x]

Posted on by tashjcurry

i was just starting to be able to live without you. but it doesn’t mean that i don’t love you still…

it was easier when you were gone, 

i could keep the dream alive.

i could convince myself that it was

bad timing, a hopeless dream, 

a trick of fate

was the reason we weren’t together,

that it wasn’t because of me.

that i wasn’t scared to love you.

but now your coming home

and that’s all i wanted,

for so long,

for you to be here with me.

but i know it was a hopeless dream,

another life,

but it wasn’t made for us

but i can’t let go of that dream

because it’s the only thing I’ve been able to 

hold onto…

and i know 

this would never last,

but it was easier when it was just a dream 

because you’ll come back

and break my heart all over again. 

and darling it was just healing.

– i was just starting to be able to live without you. but it doesn’t mean that i don’t love you still…

Posted on by tashjcurry

there just has to be happier story for us my love

there has to be another life,

another us

                  somewhere.

         a story in which 

we were happy,

                after everything.

         one where your not

          dying in my arms.

and i can’t save you.

there has to to be one,

just that 

               one.

where we live,

                    where 

        we find peace knowing

the war is over.

                           it’s done.

                 and 

we don’t have to fight 

                                   anymore.

          one 

                where 

                          we can live.

there has to be a universe 

                                      where this isn’t 

                                                   the only ending,

                                        we get.

that they’re other stories,

                                    for us

                    out there.

       because we can’t be…

this can’t be…

          we’re not this almost which was

                                            never enough for us,

                                                                     for this story.

       there has to be another.

this can’t be the only end.  

                                           we don’t deserve this my love.

i hope were there in and amongst 

                others stories, 

                                                     happy ones

                           because we lived

                      through too many 

                               tragedies

                       history wont let us forget.

and i can’t lose you again.

                                         i won’t.

      we deserve to be happy, my love.

–  there just has to be happier story for us my love.

Posted on by tashjcurry

maybe somewhere in another universe, another lifetime you’re with me

There’s a universe out there where we are together. One where you’re not with him, you’re with me, and that my actions, my choices didn’t factor into loosing you. There’s an ‘us’ somewhere among the universes. If that’s not here. Not now, nor in this world or lifetime I pray that somewhere we’re happy, that in that universe we’re not in the same situation we are in now, one where you’re slipping through my fingers and falling into his arms. That in one life somewhere we end up together. The memories, the idea of you and me live through my stories, in the words I write. We fought so hard to be with one another in this life, and for our story to end up like this is truly heartbreaking my dear. It wasn’t our fault, life just came and took us on different paths. Things like this happen, people change and drift apart. I will always love you my dear, and I’m sorry that in our story, in this lifetime we don’t end up together. There’s a universe out there where we are together, that I’m with you, and you’re with me and we’re happy, that in that universe we didn’t hurt each other like we did in this one, that our choices make us stronger rather than ripping us apart, and fate doesn’t get in the way of our happiness. I don’t know if you believe that but I have too, that in one universe there is an ‘us’, and if the fates allow thats the universe I will always choose, the one I will always dream about, that’s the one my heart lives in, the one where we are together.

– maybe somewhere in another universe, another lifetime you’re with me

Posted on by tashjcurry

i don’t want to lose that one perfect memory of us

Over the years, the pain, those memories started to fade. I started to heal. My heart didn’t hurt from the thought of you or ache for the sound of your name. I stopped looking for you in the eyes of other people, I passed in the street. I moved on with my life, but sometimes when I sat down to write you always came to my mind, were you happy, did you find somebody else. Did you sometimes still think of me and what we had, what we could have been. Sometimes I hope I’d find you in my words, in our memories. I always wanted to check up on you but I couldn’t bring myself to know if you’d fallen for someone who wasn’t me, and I know what we had happened a long time ago now but you my love hold a special place in my heart. I just wanted to remember us, and the way were were all those years ago when we were younger, happier. 

– i don’t want to lose that one perfect memory of us.

Posted on by tashjcurry

i will always be in love with you, in every lifetime.

this is my last goodbye my love,

to something that never was.

this is

my last letter,

a soft epilogue, 

an ending to maybe, 

finally 

close the book.

because

here lies our hopes,

our maybes,

what could have been.

maybe something that never was.

what i thought to have believed.

we were

a story that was tragically unwritten,

because i could never find the 

right words,

for us.

for you,

or for me

because maybe we could have been 

great, if only i had the courage 

to tell you how much i loved you 

while you were still here with me.

please

forgive me

for all i never said, 

for everything i longed to say.

i love you,

and you knew,

and that’s the tragedy. 

because i loved you 

with everything i had,

i guess it wasn’t enough 

in this universe 

but i hope it is in the 

next. 

– i will always be in love with you, in every lifetime.

Posted on by tashjcurry

there was never more of a heartbreaking word than ‘almost’.

what if i told you i loved you,

would that have changed anything?

would have it been a different story?

we were this almost,

but it was never enough 

not for them,

not for us.

i almost told you i loved you,

you almost loved me.

i almost believed you, 

you almost stayed.

we were an almost, 

could have been, 

something that never was,

in love. 

– there was never more of a heartbreaking word than ‘almost’

Posted on by tashjcurry

she’s in love with somebody else.

You told me you love her as we sat outside, dawn was approaching, the cold setting in, at this point of our story alone you already have broken my heart too many times to count now. My heart shattered once again, why did I ever think this could be a happy story, why did I think we could have been something more than this, more than friends. I know you don’t love me, but I want you to know now because I’ve had too many sleepless nights wishing you were in my arms knowing you were in hers. And I want you to be happy, that’s all I wanted but the thought of you and her just kills me. I could tell you how long I’ve felt like this but somewhere overs the years my feeling for you kinda stuck up on me, looking back they were always there but I never believed anything could come of it because I couldn’t bare it if you didn’t love me, and I didn’t want another unrequited love. So those feeling I push back down into a box I would never open because I fear if I ever did I would have lost you. As we sat I could feel my heart aching as you said those words, the ones I  longed to say about you. There was only once maybe there could have been the possibility of you and me,  but as we stayed there words between us, all the ones I never said, all those I should have said to you when I had the chance. There was a pain hidden in my eyes but darling you could read me like a book. Somewhere deep down I think you knew how I felt, I had years to tell you I should never had waited till the end to write this hoping you’d see that it should have been me, that I wanted you. All I ever wanted was you. 

– she’s in love with somebody else.